car blood kill wallet

 I have learned much over the passed however much time has passed since i last blogged. One thing…When life gives you lemons, ponder for a moment where the lemons actually came from and then throw them away once you realize that lemons don’t pay for shit. Instead of lemons life should give you money. If that were so think of all the lemons you could buy anyways. The moral of that little bluorgb was that i am inthefuck of debt to my parents, more moeny than I have, and today I had to get an oil change to prevent my car from dying. Also, to add to my troubles (something smells like teen spirit?!) I have an entire years worth of history to do in like 4 days or something. You may ask “Read, how on earth will you do that? You sure do not want to flunk ouot and waste your parents money do you?”
 The answer young grasshoper is this. Yes I do want to flunk out. History 12 is the most boring shit of life. It is a true soul drainer.
“But what about your folks money Read? You spoiled little rich kid!”
Whats a tiny little hundreds of dollars chunk on my all ready enormodebt?! In your face life! I don’t care.
The plan, run away! Work, drink, work, fish. Move to the woods, make money. Pay errthang back and move on because I won’t be attending school NEWAYZ. I already have on my list of possible new homes, SLC, Bictoria, Montreal, Mexico, Hawaii, Saskatoon, or maybe i will just galavant across the eastern hemisphere. south western? Anyone got any ideas of what I should do with my zig zagging life? ayone want to be a part of it?

I would also like to say goodbye to Ben because he moved to RedDeer, dear Ben, my love of my life and my favorite assassination target, I do not know how how I will survive hot tubbing without you. As few people know, I am being completely serious. LOVE YOU BABZZ

I would also like to say hello to all my friends who are home, you are cool and I hope i don’t flake out on all y’all before I go into the wild. PEACE

I know mountains aren’t boats but here we go! Me and Ben on a mountain.

   Today I found that the key to life is outside of the rectangle known as my bed. Woke up to see the crack of dawn at 8:30 (change takes time), and got ready for what was to be a grand adventure. Here are some photos that will help explain. (I don’t work well with cameras)

Look at him, all garbed out in Man-gear! This was about 5 minutes into the hike. We were going up Knox mtn, I know it seems pretty boring, but really. Give it a try, get in the mountain climbing state of mind.

This is the view from about halfway. Already better than your day I bet!

The man looks good, I just can’t seem to stop photographing him.

When you climb a mountain, it is very important to cook (illegally, I think) over an open fire. So far no luck. So much for Ben the woodsman!

Just kidding! Look at that rager!

Take that nature! You are no match for our wits! Good ol weenys. Delish.

Stoned off nature. (Nature not being THC filled nature. Just regular nature)

Chef Ramsey stopped by, we didn’t get a chance to get a photo with him, but here is one of the smokies he cooked for us. Gourmet, suckers!

This is the world through the eyes of Ben, artsy, I know. We were almost at the top at this point. Had to work off those carbs or whatever.

We actually found a gateway to heaven. God is a dope guy, I was surprised he had time to chat with us lowlifes.

I am not as holy as Ben, so St. Peter had to lend me a hand. Here I am reaching to grasp his hand. (check out that butt ladies, so hot)

After we got back from heaven we went to the legit top of the mountain. It was easy after God gave us super powers. Here sits St. Benjamin The Goodlooking. Just eatin’ a celebration snack.

It started hailing, real savagely. It was actually one of the most bizarre, beautiful things I’ve ever witnessed.

Just walking into the apocolypse, no big deal.

I thought this plant was cool as hell, Ben thought it was okay. Oh mother nature you never cease to amaze me.

Hooray! We made it down, got kind of dirty and learnt a lot about life. You will notice that this adventure seems to have mutated me into some sort of long torsoed short legged freak, but I am all the more wise now, so I’m cool with it.

GOODBYE FREAKS!

So sorrry

I just found this again, I can’t NOT post it, It seems I just can’t stop bloggin’ fuck! But seriously, CHECK IT OUT, this could be the single greatest video on youtube.

Keep an eye on your boners, they will be poking out eyes.

Kodachrome – Paul Simon

And to add some cheer to this blog! Mr. Paul Simon!

BoodGye Cruel World

   I feel like it is important to start off this post by saying that I just puked in my mouth. Literally, and for no reason. It sucked.

Secondly, as no one will notice because I am the only person who goes to this webpage, this is now a one page blog. Concise motherfuckers.

Plants and Animals – Feedback in the Field

 

Anyways, heres what going on in MY life. I am currently reading “I Celebrate Myself – the Somewhat Private Life of Allen Ginsberg”. For those of you who don’t know who that is, I will tell you. He was a poet, a famous poet. He wrote a poem called Howl, Lots of people think it’s a really great poem, I agree. He also wrote lots of other good poetry, and he was one of the Beat writers from the 50/60s, along with guys like Jack Kerouac. It’s a really fascinating book, and also very inspiring in many different ways. It certainly is making me see that I need to get off my ass and become more worldly in order to develop myself as a person of worth. I can see myself leaving Kelowna soon. It’s time to get out of this place that has become basically a soul killing abyss. Where will I go? What will I do? Probably not much, but any form of change would be nice. Stupid Kelowna.

Farewell,

 

Read

Oops I forgot, this is awesome.

I want to paint my bedroom “flesh of christ”. Its so whats up this season.

“yo what up” feat. Ben (circa 2017)

 Hey nobody, I decided since the reuniting of Blink 182, I 2 would come out of my indefinate hiatus and start blogging again. The last month has been a bit of a change overload (ie. new job, newly single) but all in all I’m having a good time. Been hanging out with mad bros and slightly less mad hoez, and goin’ to a few shows (and getting back into the rap game). Also, been making lots of plans, here are some of them. They are good.

1. Sasquatch – this is a double plan because I am planning on going to the music festival with this name, and I am also planning on going into the wild and finding the mythical beast.

2. “Goin’ Kerouac” on This Mothafucka – I am contemplating hitchin’ and bussin my way down many a lonesome highway all the way across this big motherfuckin island we live on, maybe go slay some french babes or atleast some authentic bagettes.

3. Learn Useful Shit – I gotta get my shit together and go to school, if you are the dean of ubco you should accept me and give me high grades

Okay, I don’t know why i shared those plans, but those are only some of them. I got bored, bad idea. ANYWAYS, enough about me.

Today I slipped into another dimension and travelled about 6 years I would say into the future. I didn’t know what future people did for fun so I went on youtube and I found out that my good friend Ben is going to star in an East Indian soap opera!

screenshot!!! (if you want the link to the video you gotta ask cause its too cool for the masses)

MISSING: Me

 I never seem to ever go on this darn website anymore. It’s such a shame, but I just haven’t had the time or the inspiration I guess. Don’t get me wrong, this is a fun site, and one day, I will write up a storm. But for now, sorry wordpress.

Late Night Bloggin’ (for laughs)

these men are funny, i want to kiss them all over. good night.

Conspiracy Theory of the day part 1

The past couple of days have been very strange…very strange indeed. The other night, as I was driving I am about 99% sure that I witnessed a UFO (Unidentified Flying Object) descend to the earth just West of Postil Lake. At first I thought it to be mearly an airplane landing, then the truth hit me, I was right beside the fucking airport. WHAT THE FUCK. I know what you are thinking; “Read, you must be terrified!”, well yes, I am but not because of ALIENS. Because the government is obviously lying to us, and if they lie about this…why not about anything else. SO this is a new thing which i will write about and no one will read but it will confirm many things that have been whispered in dark places but never brought to the masses.

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It has recently been discovered that the movie Jurassic Park was not a work of fiction, but from a real life Dinosaur island that the governemt has just off the shores of Madagascar. HOWEVER, when they tried to bring a T-Rex and a Pterodactyl back over to the great canadian laboratories. a dinosaur activist by the name of Bono got word of the transfer and freed them, only for them to run wild in the streets of our once peaceful country. Has bono any regret? You be the judge.